Strategies For Convincing A Spouse To Save A Marriage
Friday, October 23, 2009 10:37Love Strategies For Convincing A Spouse To Save A Marriage
When you’re partner seems minutes away from packing their bags or
you’re living separately already convincing a spouse to save a
marriage can seem next to impossible. If you take a step back from the
situation, though, you can see that there are realistic options for
changing the mind of a spouse who’s about to walk out. Here are some
strategies that may just get your partner to come around.
Fake it til you make it!
It’s a common strategy for business and other areas of social like, but
acting as if can work for marriages, too. It works so well because
how we act has a major influence both on how we feel and on how others see
us. For a while, try forgetting that you have anything but a perfectly
blissful marriage and treat your spouse accordingly. Now, that’s not
going to be so easy if your partner’s still bitter and liable to pick a
fight. Still, you can take advantage of those times when things are going
well to try to see your spouse as the person you were deeply in love with
when you decided to get married.
Be reasonable!
Whether you want you spouse to join you in marriage counseling or just try
out a few tips you picked up from a book, you’ll have more success in
winning them over if you don’t push. Threats, guilt trips, and begging
are more likely to push your partner away than give you any success
convincing a spouse to save a marriage. Instead, use a calm logical
approach that taps into the underlying regard you spouse most likely still
has for you or at least for the children. Statements like With
everything we’ve invested in each other, don’t you think it’s worth
a try to save it? or Wouldn’t you rather be able to tell the kids
we tried everything? can help.
Address the problems!
When convincing a spouse to save a marriage, promises to change ring
pretty hollow unless you can back them up. If you expect your spouse to
believe you’re not going to repeat certain mistakes in the future, give
them a real reason. This is especially important if you’ve had an affair
or you’re struggling with an addiction. For instance, if you’ve
started counseling to resolve an addiction that you’ve never dealt with
before, your partner has a reason to believe things will get better.
Take care of yourself!
The stress and low mood marital problems naturally bring about can leave
you feeling like you just don’t want to do anything. For your own sake,
though, don’t give in to that feeling or you’ll only make yourself
feel worse and drive your spouse farther away. Make sure you’re eating
right, getting enough sleep, and not cutting corners on personal grooming.
Stay on top of your responsibilities like finances and home maintenance.
Convincing a spouse to save a marriage isn’t always easy, but it can be
done. The most important thing you need to do is stay calm, stay upbeat,
and actively look for solutions to the problems between you. If you need
more advice on convincing a spouse to save a marriage, most marriage
counselors and professionally written self-help ebooks online can give you
some tips.
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